We're having a rough 24 hours. Last night I even cried about it. I always feel so stressed out after the Dr. Every time. It's like I'm doing fine and then having some professional person tell me things and examine her makes me doubt my existence as a mother. It's not even things that are that big of deal. I am so thankful that she is healthy and there are so many things that could go wrong. I know there are tons of mothers out there who have to deal with actual serious problems with their kids.
I have IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) and at least mine is directly related to my stress-level. When I start to get stressed my stomach turns and cramps and sometimes even swells up. Sometimes it feels like my intestines are turning to stone. So about a week before my Dr. visits I start to get the cramping just knowing that I have to watch her get shots. It is so hard for me. I know they are ultimately good for her, but I seriously ache for her. Maybe it's just that Brooklynn is such a drama queen. I don't even personally mind shots, I kinda like them. But I hate when Brooke has to get them.
Brooke's Dr. appointment was at 3:00 yesterday, which means we had to leave around 2:30. She was tired around 1:30 and I managed to keep her up until 2, but then she fell asleep on my lap. I loved the cuddle time. Then we had to go and she didn't fall back to sleep in the car. So to start off this visit she was tired, drumpy and very touchy. Then she must have had horrible memories from last time he looked down her throat (when she had Croup) because that was almost worse than the shots. I finally got her calmed down and then he had to measure her head and the tape accidentally got in her eyes. Then she finally calmed down b/c I let her play with my phone when we were waiting for the shots. Then she dropped my phone on her face and she started crying. Then she had to get 4 shots and one more needle in her toe for a hemoglobbin (sp?) test. So sad. She kept grabbing my shirt so hard like she was a little monkey and she was trying to hold onto my fur. She wouldn't even let me put her pants back on until the waiting room when she got her pretzel. (Which was a definite happy moment that she got a pretzel. The boy in front of us was offered one, I had to ask for one, but don't get me started on that.) She has dropped from 75% to 25% in weight (which they aren't concerned about but of course makes me nervous) and her hemoglobbin test was pretty low which means they have to test it AGAIN next time we go. Oh, and he confirmed my thoughts that she might be lactose intollerant. I'm still using the lactose free milk until she doesn't puke anymore and then we'll try some regular milk and see if she does it again.
She's had a fever since her shots and she's constipated so she keeps screaming in pain every so often, so sad.
I try so hard to be brave for her so she doesn't have extra things to worry about.
All in all, she is healthy, though. She's slowing down in the growth department. She's now 93% in height instead of off the charts. And she is 25% for weight. They always forget to tell me her head but I'd say normal with 95% worth of hair. And overall 150% cuteness. I was impressed with her development, all the stuff they asked me if she was doing yet she'd been doing for MONTHs...I'm so proud.
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