December 2, 2011

Big Changes...

It's starting.

I've avoided this blog entry for a while now...mostly because I've been too busy to write it, but I'm feeling a cold coming on so I'm forcing myself to rest for a minute. 
We are moving. Back to the Midwest....in two weeks. Yup. You are probably in shock right now, mostly because you might not have had a clue. The reason is that we have hardly told anyone...we were kinda waiting until we had more news to report. But alas, we are down to the wire and this is all the news we have so far.
You ask WHERE in the Midwest? As of tonight we don't know yet. Ask me in two weeks. Yeah...it's every kind of crazy around here these days.
We have been wanting to move back for years now. But it's always been one of those, "maybe someday" kind of things. Well, this summer I started praying about it. Like, really praying. Two weeks later (maybe even one week later?...it's a sort of blur) we had our answer to prayer. Josh's position at work changed and that was our sign...especially because his review date was exactly 1 day different than our lease-end date. Can you get any clearer? 
So we talked about it, prayed about it...and I asked Josh if this was really happening. Was he 80% sure? 100% sure? His answer was "100% sure." I immediately felt a little bit like I was going to throw up and then got really excited and also really sad. I realized that we have been here over NINE years! Our friends here have become our family. It's going to be really hard to say goodbye. I really don't even want to think about that part. Of course we'll visit but it's not the same. 
On the flip side, we're so excited to be closer to our families. This summer was the first time I've been back for any of my niece's Birthday parties. It sucks having to tell them year after year that we can't come. Or when  people get together for a random weekend...we just can't be part of it. It's always been hard but when you have to start explaining it to your two-year-old daughter...it suddenly gets even harder. Brooklynn is starting to be old enough that she asks about her cousins....all the time. She wants to go see them whenever we get in the car. Out of the blue she'll just ask where they are. Today she said something like, "long drive, Grandma?" I want my girls to grow up seeing them more than just a couple of times a year. We've tried to make the drive more often than that but it is SO hard....and it's over $100 in gas and tolls each way. We just can't afford it. I'm so excited to live closer. 
This move is the definition of bittersweet. We're so excited, but also so sad. We also have a lot of stuff to pack up in just a short time.
So anyway...more details. Josh had two job interviews over Thanksgiving. He even had the second part of the interview process for one of them  the morning we drove home. (yeah...putting us back here at 1 am.) We are trusting that he will get one of them but aren't sure which one yet. We decided to try and move before Christmas, then we would just be home...so we don't have to do the drive a third time in about a month. Tonight we were looking at the calender and realized that if we were to do this...Josh had to put his two weeks notice in...TOMORROW. WHAT!?!?! Who does that? (actually, today. I wrote this last night.)
I know it sounds a little crazy, but we both are confident in this decision. We know this is God's will for us and are trying to follow Him where he leads us. This whole time, over three months now....God has been laying on my heart "trust...trust....trust....trust...." Seriously. And it's scary. We've been trying to balance trust and faith and also common sense. We don't want to move without a job. What will we do? We have two kids! (God whispers again in my heart, "trust.") I'll pray, "OK, God....I'll trust." and then I think something else like, "Josh keeps applying to all these jobs and not a single thing is happening! I know I need to trust you, God but really? Not a single call back or anything?" "TRUST." 
Then it finally occurred to me...I keep hearing "trust" as a reminder because all my worries and all my needing an answer aren't really trusting God to do what He is capable of. I KNOW He can get Josh a job, in the right time but am I really acting like it worrying and not taking any type of action? No. That isn't trust. So after lots of prayer, we agreed that we need to step out in faith and truly give this whole situation over to God and really PROVE that we trust Him to take care of us and come through for us. And yes, it's scary. Probably the biggest lesson on trust so far in my life. I am really excited to see what happens. 
Just based on the timing of everything...moving weekend is December 17&18. We will either pack up the truck in PA either Saturday the 17th or maybe Friday night the 16th, drive the next day and then unload into a storage unit out in MI or IN the day after.
We're planning on staying in Fort Wayne with my parents or in Olivet with Josh's parents depending on which job Josh ends up getting...and then starting the house hunt....
We would appreciate your prayers for our family. 
Mainly for Josh to get one of the jobs (or both) that he interviewed for, and for the packing/moving process.
We will keep you updated about any more details we find out. 

3 comments:

Crissy Ponchot said...

Thank you for posting this! It's exactly what I needed to hear and we are almost in the same position. Our deepest desire is that we want to be closer to home (IN). We have submitted a resume to one job and I heard a possibility of another last night. I'm so excited for you guys! I totally know how you feel!! Praying all goes smoothly and I know God will provide all you need. Now, I just pray that for myself!! ♥

Anonymous said...

Bethany-
You have a beautiful heart, my sister-in-law! I will continue praying for you guys, also striving to trust that God will bring about His perfect plan.
Love you all!
-Aunt Erin

Dennis Ashley said...

We believe God right along with you. Praying that the door opens before your noses bump into it.